Jokes told to me

[Fritz_Fokker]

Q: What do you call the security outside of a Samsung Store?
A: Guardians of the Galaxy.

[Fritz_Fokker]

TRUE FRIENDSHIP: Walking into your friends’ house and your wifi connects automatically.
FAKE FRIENDSHIP: Walking into a friends’ house and your girlfriends’ wifi connects automatically.

[Fritz_Fokker]

Smoking will kill you... Bacon will kill you... But,smoking bacon will cure it.

[Fritz_Fokker]

Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

[Fritz_Fokker]

Duct tape is like the force, it has a light side and a dark side and it holds the universe together.

[Fritz_Fokker]

The Energizer Bunny was arrested and charged with battery

[Fritz_Fokker]

Error! No keyboard. Press F1 to continue.

[Fritz_Fokker]

For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.

[Fritz_Fokker]

If Teflon is non-stick, how do you stick Teflon to a pan?

[Fritz_Fokker]

I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.

[DipShitStar]

This post is deleted!

[nikoskokonos1]

@Fritz_Fokker these are the best jokes I've heard since you last posted here. 😂
keep up the great jokes ma dude.

[bertolt_brecht]

hehe i like some of them. but this thread is good in overall.

[julia]

even Star was speechless)

[DipShitStar]

@julia ashamed is the right word